Cathedral of Shit

has taken a well earned GAP year

Posts Tagged ‘Tracey Emin’

Huge Savings

Posted by cathedralofshit on September 11, 2010

A big hearty slap on the back to all those lovely artists who have fronted the Save the Arts Campaign launched yesterday and easily outstripping the ‘Save Southampton Library’ rival campaign also running in the interweb world. Amongst the millionaires on the list calling for the government not to slash public subsidy for the arts is dear old Tracey Emin. Here at CoS we were pleasantly surprised as we recalled Tracey’s last political statements included her well-publicised declaration that she would rather locate to France than pay the top tax-rate of 50p: “I’m simply not willing to pay tax at 50%” and of course her equally well-publicised support for the Conservatives.

We also like the claim by Save the Arts that its taken 50 years to establish “a vibrant arts culture in Britain that is the envy of the world”. What happened before this magical 50 years period? Was it all a terrible wasteland out there of Paul Nash paintings and Roger Fry’s ramblings about the art of the bushmen? I mean, we all know that Vorticism was rubbish and the pre-Raphaelites were perverts.

Final suggestion: as we’re incredibly lazy and spend our days eating KFC from our dole money as a “lifestyle option” can someone put all these petitions together so we can sign in one place to save NHS Direct, the Arts, our boys equipment in Afghanistan and the ticket offices on the tube please? Save everything!

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Out Of O(ri)fice Autoreply

Posted by cathedralofshit on August 6, 2010

We’ve got that Friday Feeling as copyrighted by the Cadbury’s ‘Crunchie’. The CoS office is like a carnival. There’s dancing and the potentially hazardous over-consumption of Malibu and pineapple juice before the lunching hour.
As the art world breaks up for the summer, off to sunnier climes, CoS are backpacking together in Thailand for a few weeks, retracing the route Leo DiCaprio took in The Beach.

By the time we return, before we’ve had a chance to get over our summer romances and gut-rot, cuts to the arts in the UK may be so severe we’ll be forced to possibly all get a proper job.
In a commercial gallery or something.

We leave you with some random top of the pops since the beginning of 2010.

Best/worst artists:
Alice Neel – ugly, boho, amateurish, retrograde nonsense. And sorry..how may times can the Whitechapel mention ‘Warhol’ in the wall texts?
Christian Boltanski – he has an archive of 35,000 heartbeats. Not mine. It stopped when I saw his work.
Marc Quinn – to be mentioned in every ‘worst artist’ list until our or his death, whichever comes first. Ours probably, self-inflicted, if we ever have to see one of those giant transgendered paperweights again.

Most ridiculous use of production funds:
Yinka Shonibare – it’s a big slave ship in a bottle with African fabrics as sails – get it? Awesome.
No Soul For Sale – what’s that you say? NO production funds? Oh. In that case…

Most ridiculous use of no production funds:
No Soul For Sale
Pumphouse Gallery

Gayest of the gay art mafia:
Thomas Houseago

Award for the biggest art ligger/hanger on:
A group prize for the Royal College Curating course
Ooh. This is too easy isn’t it? Send in your nominations via the comments please. (You can do this anonymously).

The Award for ‘I am actually, underneath my art credentials, a frightening Tory”
Traaaaaacccceeeeeeeeeeeeeyyyyyyy!

The “What Were You Thinking?” Award:
The Board of the ICA…”well, he ran the Virgin in-flight magazine… he must be qualified”. Genius.
The Board of the ICA… “he’s young, he’s energetic… we can maybe push him around a bit”. Genius.

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Emin-grating… (er, sorry).

Posted by cathedralofshit on October 7, 2009

Man the barricades! As widely reported in the weekend news Tracey Emin might bugger off to France because of the new rate of 50% income tax on the highest earners in our fair land. And given that many of her collectors enjoy the fruitful benefits of erm, tax management, why indeed not? Well because Ireland might be a better bet – as the infamous section 195 of the Taxes Consolidation Act 1997 means that earnings made from works deemed artistic by the Revenue Commissioners are tax-free. But what’s this – a fly in the oinment? Not only does it look like that Ireland’s scheme (which has attracted fellow high-profile artistic refuseniks like erm, Freddy Forsythe) might be under threat: (see http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/8245598.stm), there’s also the small matter that the Irish Revenue Commissioners get to decide whether the art works in question have either “cultural or artistic merit” in order to qualify from exemption.
Oh well France it is for our favourite Emin-ence-Grease (is that how you spell it editor?)!

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